Letters To A Beloved Daughter
by of self
Summary: One letter for every birthday of yours, my little baby girl. Shane centric. Complete.
1. First Year

**I decided to take on a challenge by Silver Aurora. The prompt was "Shane and Mitchie have a daughter and Mitchie dies", well part of it. This fic was inspired by letters which my mom wrote to me on my birthday every year and still does. I cherish those letters and I thought it would be nice to use the concept of it here.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Camp Rock.**

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Baby Girl,

I am sitting here writing a letter to you which you will be able to read the day you turn twenty-two. I am going to write a letter for every birthday baby, it was your mother's idea and one of her last wishes and so I am fulfilling it. I've been sitting here for the past half and hour staring at the paper. Because in actuality I was never any good at writing down my feelings, that was your mother's area of expertise. But as the tears begin to roll down my face, strangely the words begin to flow too.

I and your mother waited nine months to hold you in our arms. Nine difficult months. Your mother stayed in bed for most of those months afraid of harming you in anyway possible. You kicked and moved a lot you know, and you also gave her this craving for pickles and bacon which to this day I do not understand.

But your mother underwent it all just to hold you in her arms. I grieve over the fact that your mother might never be able to hold you but at least I can rest knowing she got to hold you once before she died.

The first time I held you in my arms, I felt so scared. I thought I would drop you or simply not know what to do. You were so fragile, tiny precious and you looked so helpless. But at the same time, it was the most joyous feeling in the world holding my own flesh and blood in my arms. I was always scared that I would never be a good father; I was never exactly a good brother. Your mom always had faith in me though. And when you came into this world, I knew I would be the best father I could and reaffirm your mother's faith in me.

You'll grow up never knowing your mother, baby. And that really breaks my heart because I know you would have loved your mother, everyone did. And she would have loved you too, more than she loved me. I wouldn't have minded though. Your mother, baby girl, was called Mitchie, short for Michaela and I thought she was the reason the sun shone and world revolved on it's axis. I still do and always will, except now you also are the reason. She was my everything and so are you baby girl, from the time I held your little body in my arms.

The pain of her loss is only eased by your presence because she left a part of herself in you. When I look at you baby, I see Mitchie in you and that gladdens my heavy heart.

Your mother may not be here physically but she is here in you. In essence and in spirit. And that makes me cherish you all the more baby. I want to hold you close and sing you to sleep. I want to wipe away tears and kiss away boo-boos. I want to teach you how to drive (even though I will groan about how I don't want you to drive) I want to drive away any boy that will come near you baby because remember baby, boys are never up to any good.

I want to do everything a father can and most of all I am waiting for anticipation with the day when I will hear you say Daddy. I know it will be the sweetest sound I have ever heard.

I simply want to see my baby grow up into a beautiful person, just like her mother.

Do you know, baby girl, you look exactly like your mother. You have her big brown eyes and her sweet little nose. I can't tell you if your hair will also be like hers, soft, silky, straight and brown. There is only soft fuzz on your head but I am sure you will have hair like hers.

Your uncle Jason is holding you right now and your Auntie Tess is wiping away tears which she thinks nobody can see. These two people are going to play a very important part in your life, Uncle Jason is determined to be the best uncle and the most fun he can and your aunt is determined to dress you because she says I can't even dress myself let alone you (don't worry baby, I can dress myself and I can learn to dress you). And they love you to pieces or as your aunt says more than any other designer.

Your aunt Caitlyn is cooing over you too. I know she will stop your Auntie Tess from going overboard on dressing you. She was your mother's best friend and is your other godmother. Your Uncle Nate is the one who will help you with your math and balance out all the fun.

And me baby girl, I'll be there to love you and to hold you, forever.

Do you know baby, your aunties have already made themselves your mothers. You'll have two mothers growing up and three dads too. Because Uncle Jason and Nate have already made themselves your fathers. That is why your mother went so peacefully baby girl because she knew she was leaving you in good hands.

I've shed so many tears today baby, grief and happiness make for such painful intermingling, the tears are dripping down on the sheet and causing the ink to run but I can't help it because they just won't stop. I just wanted all of us to be one big happy family but I know we'll always be happy family because your mother is watching us from above.

Just know Michaela Caitlyn Theresa Gray, I'll love you no matter what. My baby girl you'll always be.

Love Always,

Daddy.

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**The challenge was also to take a clichéd plot line and make it not cliché. So I hope this is innovative enough. Reviews would be lovely as this is the first time I am doing a multi – chapter fic from Shane's perspective. :)**


	2. Fifth Year

_Thank you for the lovely responses for the 1st chapter. Sorry for the long wait but exams got in the way. Anyways they are over now, so here you have a new chapter. Hope you like it, enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: I do not own CR or or 'The Cat in the Hat'_

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Baby Girl

I am writing this as you lie sleeping in your Uncle Nate's arms. You look like an angel, a tiny little angel with chocolate smears on your dress and Mr. Bear clutched tight in your arms. I cannot believe five years have passed so quickly. Baby, do you can count how old you are now? You showed me today proudly. My little girl is growing up, surely but slowly and it twists my heart a little but I am happy too.

Remember baby girl, how I thought you would have hair like your mothers? I turned out to be ever so wrong. You have a profusion of silky blonde curls. I was shocked because to be honest baby girl, every one in my family has brown or black hair and every one in your mother's family has brown or black hair. But it doesn't make me love you any less. But you do have your mother's nose and eyes still.

Today for your birthday baby, I dressed you myself. And I was proud about until your aunty Tess and aunty Caitlyn came and screeched. Yes, screeched baby, my ears hurt even now. Apparently I had messed everything up. I must reiterate baby, I did not, I just put you in mismatched clothes and plaited your hair a little differently. Okay maybe I did mess up, the point was you liked it. However it was not enough to tell your aunts that.

But after your aunts dressed you up in pink frock with small frills, I must admit you looked like a princess baby girl. My very own darling little princess. I wonder what you're mom thinks of you baby. Does she see you growing everyday, does she see me reading the 'The Cat in the Hat' to you? Does she miss us as much as I miss her?

I know she does baby, because she loves us. I am convinced of that. But sometimes I want her to stand next to me and feel proud of the little girl that you are and the woman that you will grow into one day.

Today baby girl was the first you went to school. And baby, you went in without looking back at me even once. I came back home and cried. It's been a while baby since I cried but today I couldn't help it baby. A father's worst fear is when their daughter's will stop needing them.

But why dwell on that on such a happy occasion baby. I'll enjoy my time with you until I can. Your uncle Jason just whacked me on the head. Apparently I was crying over the letter. Aren't I a waterspout of tears today baby? Don't worry, I'll try to be manly and pass it off as something else, like allergies from the ink. I am clever to you know.

Shall I tell you about your presents baby? Your Aunt Tess got you your very first set of stockings and they are very pretty. I must say baby, I was scared she'd get you some sort of war paint or make-up as she calls it. You don't need it anyway baby because you are perfect the way you are. Your Uncle Jason got you a small canary which you names Big Bird. Someday you'll get a laugh out of that I know.

You're Uncle Nate and Aunt Caitlyn got you a small bike. And you've already told me we are going riding tomorrow. All I can say thank God, you aren't sixteen yet and asking me to teach you how to drive a car. (Your aunt Tess wants to add at this point that she will teach you. Which will absolutely not happen. She drives like a maniac baby and I am not going to allow you to even get into the car with her. And she is so very nosy too)

Once again I am crying baby but because your aunt whacked me on the head for saying she was nosy. She is freakishly strong, baby. And I would say more but I don't want my bones broken because then who is going to throw you up in the air and catch you?

And I baby girl got you the best gift of all. No I am not boasting baby, you told me it was the best. I got you a small little guitar. You told me that you wanted to join my band. There was no need to ask baby, you always were a part of the band. Now you and I will sing annoying songs that will drive the whole family mad, I can hardly wait for that, my little partner in crime. I can imagine your aunt Caitlyn chasing me around threatening to ruin my perfect head of hair. But it will be worth it, baby.

Another year has passed, and as I look back on its moments, I have only one thing to say baby. The day you came into my life was the best day of my life. But the happiness you bring to me everyday by just saying 'I love you daddy', nothing can surpass that baby, nothing can and ever will.

Love always,

Daddy.

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_I know it was a little choppy and I am sorry. Anyways reviews would be very much appreciated. :)_


	3. Tenth Year

_Here is the third chapter. Hope you like it. :)_

_Disclaimer: I do not own CR or Fender Stratocasters._

_Oh and this is also dedicated to **LittleRedOne**who has been really awesome. I don't know if she will read this but it's my way of saying thank you for reviewing 5 of my fics in the past few days._

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Dear Michaela (baby girl)

I know you said that no more baby girl, but I have been calling you that ever since you were a day old so I compromised, okay? You know Michaela; the opening sentence of the letter makes me wistful. Cause my baby is ten years old and no longer wants to be called baby girl by her dad. In your words honey, it sucks.

But I can manage it, I can call you Michaela. I mean I am the cool dad (I know I just became un-cool by saying that) I can handle it. No darling, I just cannot. I have to call you baby girl because you are my one and only baby girl for always and evermore.

There is a reason behind why I call you that name baby. It's so that I can somehow stem the process of you growing up in my mind at least. Though this year baby girl, it was an unpleasant jolt, an unpleasant reminder of the fact that you are growing up.

This year baby was the year of the training bra.( I feel as if I should pound some drums cause your aunts tell me it's a really big event in a girls life, getting her first bra, not in my opinion though)

I didn't even know it was necessary until Caitlyn and Tess reminded me. And now I wish they hadn't, because with training bras come proper bras and with them come boys. And that scares me baby, that the thought of some idiot doing something. I know it's unnatural but I'm a father, I'm allowed to fear compulsively for my daughter's safety, aren't I?

Caitlyn and Tess had to literally drag me there along with you. I don't think I have ever hated visiting a clothing shop more. And as usual your aunts made radically different choices. You're aunt Tess had some frilly wisp of material in her hands and your aunt Caitlyn had something black and solid looking. I of course did not want to pick anything at all, but who listens to dads nowadays?

So finally you comprised and picked something that had some bows but also looked like it was made of something more than cotton candy. And then it hit me baby, this growing up, I can't stop it, however much I want to. It is going to happen, regardless. It's starts with a training bra and ends with the wedding dress. And that brought on the waterworks. (I am sorry baby, but I seem to be making this quite the tradition so excuse the blotches)

So now do you get why I call you baby girl and always will as much as I love your real name? I know you will because I am pretty sure I have a smart intelligent and lovable daughter who won't grudge her poor old un-cool dad the one nick name he has for her.

My baby girl is ten years old and when I see you off to school or writing or reading or simply watch you, I cannot believe that more than 10 years have gone by. And the little thing I once held in my hands is now roughly half my size (though I still carry you sometimes baby and I will until I can and my back won't break).

And once again I wonder if your mother sees what a pretty little girl you have become? And like always I reassure my self that your mother can see and wants to tell me that I am spoiling you a bit too much and that you and I should have ice-cream before bed. We'll not listen to that part okay? Cause ice-cream is our tradition and will always be( not if you are suffering from a cold though, then your mother would smite me with a lightning bolt because she is in the heavens and all)

I am no longer that under confident dad of old baby, though I still have my moments when I cant understand why you are crying, but I know I can always wipe away your tears and take you quickly to one of your aunts and console you on the way despite not knowing what the heck is going on. Because that's what dads are for, wiping away tears and consoling their daughters.

One consolation is that you still take your little guitar and play with me. Though I wonder how soon that is going to stop? So baby girl to ensure you still play with me (yes your dad can be devious sometimes) I got you a Fender Stratocaster -which though cost and arm and a leg- was worth everything just to see the look on your face. A look of pure delight and that made me feel so happy baby, even beyond what music makes me feel.

You are my everything baby and even music comes a distant second to you. Your smiles make me happy your tears make me sad. And I know the years ahead are not going to be the easiest or the happiest but just know baby, no matter what I'll always be there to wipe away your tears and make you smile. Always.

Love always (this word is being sorely overused but for a reason)

Your old and un-cool daddy.

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_If you hated it or loved it or even if you have any ideas as to what topics I could touch upon in the next letter, just let me know in a review._

_Happy New Year everyone. Hope you have a great year ahead of you. :)_


	4. Thirteenth Year

**So sorry for not updating this for so long. Life and (mostly) laziness got in the way. Hope you dont hate me for it. This is the 13th birthday letter.**

**Dont own CR.**

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Dear baby girl,

This past year has been, well for lack of a better word- tumultuous. You see baby, this year was the year where you became a woman in the every sense of the word. Well baby, you got your first period. And if that wasn't enough to frazzle your old dad, you even went and got yourself a boyfriend.

Nobody seems to cut us dads any breaks, do they?

I swear baby when you told me you were bleeding I had my first ever panic attack. So many horrible thoughts raced through my minds before I realized that it was your period. Your aunts had been preparing me for it for quite a while but I swear baby, I still ran around like a headless chicken for a while.

But I think what was interesting was going to buy the tampons. It was an experince in itself and I dont think I'll ever forget it. I want to say that that I was able to do everything perfectly without any hitch. But then I would be lying. A kind old lady was the one who helped pick the right ones for you. I don't think I'm ever going to buy tampons again by myself baby. It was scarring to say the least.

We'll go together the next time, okay?

I finally thought everything was fine when I crossed that hurdle but one month later you dropped a bomb on me. You told me that a boy had asked you to the dance. I took it really calmly I tell you. I only hopped around in a rage for a few moments and for the rest I was rendered incapable of speech. Luckily your aunt Tess came over and was able to calm me down.

She said she would take you dress shopping and for the first time in your life baby, you went without me. I always knew that day would come but I dint think I was expecting it so soon. So I did the next best thing, I went to your aunt Caitlyn's house and moped around. Until she threw me out of the house, saying I needed to grow up.

And yes, I did need to grow up and realize that my little girl was growing up and it was time I let her do so.

So baby, I took the high road and had a man to man conversation with the boy. He's not the best but he's okay. He'll do for now. Because he's shit scared of me and I doubt he'd try any tricks.

But on another note I can understand why fathers behaved the way they did when they saw me. Your grandpa actually threatened me with numb chucks, if I ever did anything to make your cry. And I would say like to say I made sure those numb chucks never came near me not because I was scared of your grandpa, simply because I hated making your mom cry.

Another year has passed and though it wasn't the smoothest I wouldn't want to exchange it for anything else. Because if at all this year has brought you and me closer. And that's all a father really needs.

Love always

Daddy.

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**Reviews are always welcome. :)**


	5. Fifteenth Year

Sorry for the delay but for a while I was overwhelmed with projects and I had no time to breathe let alone write. Anyways I hope you dont hate me and I hope you like this.

Disclaimer: I dont own CR

And I have nothing against goths just thought it would be a nice way to make Shane hyperventilate cause I'm evil like that. :)

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Dear Baby Girl.

You should know that I'm hyperventilating as I'm writing this. Do you want to know the cause? Well…let me tell the future you. You just told me you wanted to get a tattoo. Thank god it's not some idiotic boy's name you want to get tattooed. It's your mother's. But still it's a tattoo!!!

And that has me hyperventilating and gasping for breath like a dying fish. Because you are only fifteen and not old enough to decide whether you can permanently disfigure your body with your mother's name. I personally think the idea is admirable baby, the fact that you want to imprint yourself with your mother's name but a tattoo? That simply ain't the way to go.

Because tattoo's are just the beginning. Today it will be a tattoo and then tomorrow it will body piercing in parts which are too painful to even think of and then you will colour your pretty brown hair black and then you will become a part of the Goth sub-culture. And then you will wear grunge clothing…and it's a vicious circle I tell you.

Okay your uncle Nate just read over my shoulder and told me I was being very stereotypical and melodramatic. Yeah…whatever. The point is baby there are other ways to remember your mother by. And I'm pretty sure if I let you get a tattoo and then someone's going to kicking my ass all the way to hell. Or she'll make your Aunt Caitlyn or Aunt Tess do it cause they are freakishly strong.

Anyways I'm sure you do not want to know how much more I hyperventilated. I just want to tell you darling that this year had it's ups and downs but it was still good all the same.

I know that boy Sam maybe and up for you but for me he simply was a down. And don't worry baby any boy will always be a down for your strange dad. But I think the real highlight of this year for me was when you went up on stage and sang a song your mother had written just for you.

Trust me when I say this baby, there was not a dry eye in the auditorium. Even that old dragon of a principle was wiping away tears. And now I'll say something extremely cheesy baby. You have the voice of an angel because you are an angel.

Do you want to know why you are an angel baby? It's because even though I must be the most annoying dad ever you put up with me and you love me. and that no matter what happens you'll always be my baby. (And those are your words. you really did say them)

And I just cannot thank god enough for giving the best daughter in the whole wide world. Cause that's what you are baby, the best. And I'm the luckiest dad ever. Period.

Love always

Your Dad.

P.S: I'm glad to let you know that you didn't get the tattoo baby. It's got to be one of the best decisions you ever made. Now I only hope the body piercing were a joke.

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Review please?


	6. Twenty Second Year

**And here is the sixth chapter. One more to go after it. Hope you like this installment. :)**

**Playlist : Moby - Raining Again.**

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Dear baby girl,

This time I'm not even going to make an effort to hold the tears back. Seeing you in your black robe and feathered hat was the proudest moment of my life. And for once I wasn't the only one bawling my eyes out. Your aunts and uncles were too even your uncle Nate who rarely sheds any tears at all.

Somehow twenty two years have passed by too soon. I remember all too vividly the day when I first held you in my hands. You were so tiny and I was so scared. Now I can hardly believe the girl standing in front me. I still feel scared because you are my only daughter and letting you go so that you can live your won life is the hardest thing I have ever done.

But it's all a part of parenthood, letting your children go live their lives even if you are so afraid that they're gonna get hurt.

You should be happy to know baby, I've finally come to accept that boy. Okay, Sam as he's called. Though no one will ever be good enough for my baby, I will grudgingly admit he comes pretty close.

(By the way, could you please keep the displays of affection to minimum when I'm around? Seriously its gag inducing to see you'll eat each other faces. And before you say that I'm being hypocritical let me just tell you me and your mom never made out in front of your grandparents. It was simply too weird and plus your granddad was way too scary.)

Though if he hurts you even one little bit, all you have to do is say the word baby, I'll come right over and whack the hell out of him. And yes I do mean it, I am not kidding around. And don't tell me I have to take anger management classes. I don't go around beating up everyone do I? Only some boys who were being idiots and teasing you that one time. Other wise I'm the most peace loving person around.

And your uncles just added that they'll come beat him too. I'll just take this time to mention how much I love them for saying that.

But baby, I just wanted to tell you that I know your mother was proud of you as she watched you from above. I think she has been proud of you every single day and so have I. But today we were prouder than ever. Because watching you walk across the stage to receive your diploma showed us that you have grown up to become a beautiful and intelligent human being. And though I will always miss the little girl in pig tails, I'll always love you for what you have grown into.

Often the choices we make define our lives. And you baby made all the right ones. Even with me constantly breathing over your neck and constantly being ridiculously over protective, you didn't do anything in a fit of rebelliousness that you would have regretted.

And for that I thank you. Because never would I have been able to forgive myself if I had driven you to do something that was drastic and life changing. Though I realize I have come close to driving you to madness.

Please understand that whatever I did, it was because I loved you and only wanted the best for you. I wanted to protect you from every bad thing in the world, not realizing that everything that happens, good or bad, teaches us something

I guess it's what parents want to do. Protect their kids from everything even when they know it's impossible.

But now I've learnt that I can't keep you from falling and getting hurt. But I can always pick you up and then comfort you because you got hurt.

And someday you'll do that too. Try to protect your children against everything and then realize you can't. But if there's anything I learnt from raising you baby, it was that no matter what happens, and no matter what our children do we'll always love them. And telling them that is very important because it is what makes it all better.

But children aren't ours to hold forever even though they are a part of us. And you have a life outside of our small little family. So I wish you all the happiness in the world my darling. You are in the spring of your life and you have so much before you. I want you to be able to live every moment of your life. Cherish all the joys and weather all the pains.

But whenever you need me, I'll be there baby, waiting with open arms. Because remember I'll always love you even if I didn't say it all the time and with me you'll always have a home.

Love for ever and always,

Your dad.

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**Reviews are always thrilling to recieve. :)**


	7. A Daughter Responds

A/N : I am really sorry for the long wait. I have no other excuse other than the fact that I have the attention span of a flea and tend to get easily distracted. Once again million apologies an I hope you dont hate me.

Disclaimer: dont own.

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Dear dad,

Remember how in every letter, you apologized for the tears and the splotchy writing; well I have to apologize too. Because ever since I started reading all the letters, I haven't stopped crying. And right now as I'm writing this, I'm crying too. So excuse the blotches.

Now don't get all worried. I can't help the tears because I'm just so overwhelmed after reading all the letters. Reading all the letters just made me realize the enormous magnitude of everything. You took care of me single handedly since I was a day old. And there are not many parents who can do that.

But I'm sure even back then you were not like everybody else.

And do you know something, daddy, never once did I realize the lack of a mother. Cause you were both mother and father to me.

Everything you ever did, I don't know how I will ever repay you. Because gratitude isn't enough and will never be enough. What you gave me was an immeasurable amount of knowledge, happiness and love. You made the person I am today. And if I am a successful, well rounded individual today, it's all because of you.

I know you were a little disappointed that I didn't join the music industry. But lets face facts shall we, dad. I can't sing for toffees or peanuts and nor can I play an instrument to save my be happy about the fact that I'm gonna be a publicist and that way still be close to the industry. Knowing you Daddy, I know that you will happy.

I know it must have been hard when mom died, but put away all your grief just so that you could take care of me. And every time you told me mom was in the heavens if brought me a little closer to her. And though I never grew up with her, I know all about her, thanks to you dad.

I know mom would be proud of the way you raised me.

Thank you so much daddy, for everything you ever did for me. I know things always didn't go smoothly but you were always there for me when I needed you the most. Remember the tattoo, my first high school party and the date which never really happened? Though you did hyperventilate, first and foremost you were my dad who loved me every much and you never let me forget that. And there aren't enough words to tell you how much I appreciate that.

Because all a teenage girl needs some times are reassurances that she is loved and not a lecture about right or wrong.

I know you also had a hard time coming to terms with Sam. But I just think that's your protective instincts kicking into overdrive. At least the one thing you have in common is me and someday I'm gonna make sure you love that boy. And besides daddy, you'll at least have to tolerate him cause he's gonna be your son-in-law. Isn't that wonderful? (Please don't burst a blood vessel. Aunt Caity, Tess, if you are around please calm him down.)

He asked me today after graduation. And he's coming soon to ask for your permission. Please don't injure him or I'll be very mad and will most definitely getting a tattoo.

But don't worry daddy. You always be number one in my life.

I don't know if I told you enough daddy, but I love you. Thanks for everything, and most of all thanks for being the best father a girl could ever ask for.

Love always,

Your baby girl.

(even when I'm old and eighty)

P.S – also tell Aunt Caity, Aunt Tess, Uncle Nate and Uncle Jason for everything. Because without them I cleary wouldn't have been wearing bra's or even dressing like a girl. I love you guys.

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And that was the ending. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, alerted or favorited. You guys are awesome. And thanks especially to Silver Aurora, she was the person who gave me the idea in the first place.

Anyhow do let me know if you hated it or loved it in a review. :)


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